bags don't pack themselves.
and trips to south africa don't plan themselves either.
i need to get busy.
character flaw - lack of attention to detail.
ugh.

Today was incredible. There were definite times of frustration - like almost getting run over by a huge semi. or getting lost literally in the middle of nowhere.
But today, as I drove away from visiting the kids from the camp I worked at in Machakos...I said to myself, "And this is what heaven will be like."

We pulled up to where the kids were, I got out of my car and started down the dirt path and I was overwhelmed with music and singing. All the kids were lined up coming down the road dancing, singing, and then they all shouted "TAAANNAAAA".
I was speechless.
Gosh, there are no words. Except, really, I believe I experienced a little piece of heaven on earth today.
and im thankful.
so so thankful.

This post does not do the experience justice, but again, I really have a ton to do tonight. and it's midnight.
yikes.

Days like today- hearing children sing to their Maker, enjoying the beauty of God's creation driving through the mountains, kisses from sweet, little Kenyan girls - days like this only point me to Jesus. And remind me of what a good, generous, and loving God I serve.

pockets full of redemption

You're my only hope

You come like the sun

with pockets full of redemption

and You come

with the sun.

people.

my heart is full.

highlights from today:
1. little kids' prayers..."jesus thank you for the plants, and the trees, and the sun, and toys, and shoes, and...."
2. spending one last day with the kids at the children's home
3. spraying silly string with kenyan kiddos
4. a giant farewell donut/cake
5. listening to an 8 year old sing "O Come, O Come, Emmanuel"
6. talking with high schoolers about my future/God's provision (best advice I received: "don't freak out." ha)
7. goodbye hugs
8. laffy taffy jokes
9. washing dishes for over an hour with a sweet friend
10. a phone call from america

my entire day was spent around God's most beautiful creation...people.
little ones, old ones, black ones, white ones, funny ones, grumpy ones, sweet ones, hyper ones, smelly ones...and all I can think about now, as the day ends and I'm completely exhausted, is just how much God loves each one of us.
today God chose to totally bless and encourage me through his children. and I am one thankful girl.

boom.

why am I going to miss Africa, you ask??


[sunset over the Rift Valley]
just one reason.


Okay so what has been going on with me over the past week?
We had our big AIM Conference out in Kijabe at Rift Valley Academy. It was really good - got to catch up with friends, make some new ones, attend some workshops, breathe clean air, and just spend some down time enjoying the beauty of Kenya.
I didn't realize how refreshing it was, until I came back to Nairobi. I have had a renewed passion/purpose for the work I'm doing - specifically the Madagascar project.

Work has been good. I haven't written much about what I do at work, mainly because for the past 6 months I couldn't really.
But the Madagascar project is really unique - I mean, I get to edit footage of the beach every day. :)
Seriously though, there is a neat dynamic that comes with working with a team. I really like it. It constantly challenges me.
And since I've been back from conference, I've realized just how much I appreciate the other guys I work with.
I couldn't ask for a better way to wrap up my time with OFM.
Today I was reminded of what it is we do at OFM...telling/showing the world about what God is doing in Africa. What an honor.

The past 2 evenings I've spent catching up with some sweet, Kenyan friends. Last night it took me almost 2 hours to meet my friend that literally was about 6 miles away. Nairobi traffic is unlike anything I've ever experienced. I'm convinced I can drive anywhere now.
Tonight I got to hold a tiny Kenyan baby boy who was only an hour old!! :)
My friend Maurine, started a home for pregnant women living on the streets of Nairobi. One of the girls had a precious baby boy tonight, and I spent some time at the hospital with them.
I'll tell you more about Maurine in another blog post. She's one of my favorite people on the planet.

I've also started packing things up. I know, shocking, but I am going to try NOT waiting till the night before this time. Packing/being organized is not one of my strengths. Working on it.

Days are full and busy, and if I'm honest I feel a little stretched thin - trying to wrap things up, spend time with people, make travel plans, say goodbyes, keep in touch back home, think about the future, etc, etc.
But it's good. I just wish I had more time. But don't we always?

I did have a lot of confirmation today that God had me here for this season at just the right time. This season is coming to an end, and God had the right people, the right work, the right place set out for me during these months. I'm certain of that.
Things are already starting to change, and the reality is, that once I leave Kenya, things are going to continue to change. Even though I am making plans to come back, when I return things will look very different. That truth is hard to swallow but also exciting.
More on that later.

Looking forward to this weekend - big BBQ for kids at Shangalia and teaching/going away party at youth group.

I'll leave you with a quote from the book I'm reading called "Just Do Something: A Liberating Approach to Finding God's Will or How to Make a Decision Without Dreams, Visions, Fleeces, Impressions, Open Doors, Random ... Liver Shivers, Writing in the Sky, etc"

We must renounce our sinful desire to know the future and to be in control. We are not gods. We walk by faith, not by sight. We risk because God does not risk. We walk into the future in God-glorifying confidence, not because the future is known to us but because it is known to God. And that’s all we need to know. Worry about the future is not simply a character tic, it is the sin of unbelief, an indication that our hearts are not resting in the promises of God.

Anxiety is simply living out the future before it gets here.

Thanks to the faithful few who have still been checking in on the blog.
Sorry for my lack of posts this month.
Things have been really busy, and since my computer is broken, it makes updating much more difficult.

4 days left in the office.
10 days left in Kenya.
7 days in South Africa.
And then I'll be home.

I can't believe it.
I will try and give a proper update later today.

The next 10 days are sure to be very full - finishing projects, dinners, events, teaching, packing, and lots of goodbyes.

thanks.

Just wanted to say "thank you" seeing it's Thanksgiving and all.
I took this picture awhile ago with some of the kids at Shangalia.
Don't worry, most of you will have a copy to put on your fridge by Christmas. :)
exciting, I know.

Today was a good day. I had a sweet morning with one of my favorite ladies in Kenya, turkey and stuffing with friends, baked a bunch of pumpkin bread, curry and games with friends tonight, and got to talk to both my parents.

I really am thankful for so much. I look at my life and all that I've experienced in just 23 short years and I feel so very blessed. I can't help but think about all the people in my life who have impacted me in such a great way - some of them who've been around forever, others who have come and gone with a new season in life. It's fun getting to share life with people. It's what we're made to do.

And now I'll just end tonight's post there. I won't talk about how I only have 17 days left in Kenya. right? :)
What happened to me? I used to love change and new things. I guess I still do. I just really love it here too.

I miss running. A lot. I really want to get back into the longer distances. It's just so hard here.
thinking about running the Austin Marathon in February if I'm in America. right mal and monica?? :)
Tana + running = a happier Tana
I should work on that.

Okay, the end.
Love y'all.

willing?

A lot on my mind these days - thinking about leaving Kenya, being in America, coming back to Africa, etc, etc.
My only prayer this morning...

May I be willing to go wherever it is, serving whomever You ask, whenever Your perfect timing sees fit.

happy thanksgiving.